2015 has been a brutal and beautiful year for me. It has chafed off my dead skin, something that I had been living under for a really long time, and turned me into a new person.
Come to think of it, 2015 has been a source of constant turns for me, constantly making me into a newer version of myself. I honestly don’t think my fifteen year old self would believe how much I have accomplished in a year’s time.
I’m going to share a few things that I did this year (or maybe this year did for me) that turned me into someone fresh, someone new, and someone beautifully changing.
- I started a blog. This is by far my biggest accomplishment. I had always been looking for a place, which would belong to me, where I could voice my opinions. I have always found that I am more consistent, persuasive and bold when I write, rather than when I speak. A lot of people don’t tend to take me seriously when I’m saying something, unless I’m really angry and my eyes are doing crazy things, but people read what I write. I’ve had a few readers mail me about how my posts have made them realize that they are feminists and that they too believe in pro-choice. Nothing in the world feels better than to know that you have had a positive affect on a person.
I went to M.U.N. and battled with my stage fright. My MUN experience was amazing. I had went to AIS Chennai for MUN as a delegate of Bangladesh. I have always been a little (okay, maybe a lot) nervous about speaking in front of an audience. But MUN was like this HUGE stepping stone for conquering my stage fright. Speaking at the MUN conferences made me feel more comfortable with myself and I learnt a lot about public speaking. I also made so many new friends from all around the world that I still keep in touch with.- I learnt how to subdue my OCD. A lot of you probably already know about this. I have written a lot about dealing with OCD and how I gradually overcame it. I am obviously aware that I haven’t completely gotten over it completely but at least I know that I am the one in control. Starting a blog also really helped me with my OCD. I met amazing bloggers who dealt and wrote about similar things, especially the beautiful Rachel Griffin.
- I became Pro-Choice. I had never actually thought about abortion rights as a part of feminism until a few months back. I had actually never really thought about abortion or getting pregnant. It was something that was far off for me, something that I didn’t need to think about now. But being introduced to Planned Parenthood and the Reproductive Rights Centre, I realized how important it actually is to educate people about having a right over their own body.
- I became more open with my family. This was especially important for me. I had previously not been so open with my family, I just didn’t think that they would understand me, which I guess is a pretty normal notion for a teenager. But I am so glad that I have started opening up with them. I can now comfortably discuss my OCD with them and talk to them about feminism and sexism. I have also started talking to my two cousin brothers, they are pretty cool.
- I became internet friends with some really awesome people. Here’s a shout out to Leah K. Stewart who inspired and motivated me to follow my passion without any doubts. To Oriana Walker who was the first person to write a poem for me, a very beautiful one. To Rahul from IvyTies who cleared up almost all of my doubts about college admission.
So 2015 was a pretty great year for me. I did a lot of things that I am proud of and I did make some mistakes but I learnt from them as well.
2016 is going to see a new me, a better me and I cannot wait for that.
Paakhi Bhatnagar 